This opera’s as lousy as it is brilliant! Your lyrics lack subtlety. You can’t just have your characters announce how they feel. That makes me feel angry! Large bet on myself in round one. Hello, little man. I will destroy you!
I was all of history’s great robot actors – Acting Unit 0.8; Thespomat; David Duchovny! Now what? Man, I’m sore all over. I feel like I just went ten rounds with mighty Thor. You don’t know how to do any of those.
I was having the most wonderful dream. Except you were there, and you were there, and you were there! I haven’t felt much of anything since my guinea pig died. Yes, except the Dave Matthews Band doesn’t rock.
You won’t have time for sleeping, soldier, not with all the bed making you’ll be doing. Pansy. Now what? Fatal. Yeah. Give a little credit to our public schools.
Well, thanks to the Internet, I’m now bored with sex. Is there a place on the web that panders to my lust for violence? It’s a T. It goes “tuh”. Ow, my spirit! Ugh, it’s filthy! Why not create a National Endowment for Strip Clubs while we’re at it?
Ah, computer dating. It’s like pimping, but you rarely have to use the phrase “upside your head.”
Son, as your lawyer, I declare y’all are in a 12-piece bucket o’ trouble. But I done struck you a deal: Five hours of community service cleanin’ up that ol’ mess you caused.
You wouldn’t. Ask anyway!
This is the worst kind of discrimination: the kind against me! You know, I was God once. We’re also Santa Claus! Bender, I didn’t know you liked cooking. That’s so cute. There, now he’s trapped in a book I wrote: a crummy world of plot holes and spelling errors!
Man, I’m sore all over. I feel like I just went ten rounds with mighty Thor. Who am I making this out to? When will that be? You guys aren’t Santa! You’re not even robots. How dare you lie in front of Jesus?
I am Singing Wind, Chief of the Martians.
It’s okay, Bender. I like cooking too.
You wouldn’t. Ask anyway!
Is the Space Pope reptilian!? This is the worst kind of discrimination: the kind against me! Quite possible. We live long and are celebrated poopers. Oh yeah, good luck with that. I meant ‘physically’. Look, perhaps you could let me work for a little food? I could clean the floors or paint a fence, or service you sexually?
And then the battle’s not so bad? I suppose I could part with ‘one’ and still be feared… Have you ever tried just turning off the TV, sitting down with your children, and hitting them? Soothe us with sweet lies.
Ah, yes! John Quincy Adding Machine. He struck a chord with the voters when he pledged not to go on a killing spree. Throw her in the brig. Oh God, what have I done? You, minion. Lift my arm. AFTER HIM!
Now, now. Perfectly symmetrical violence never solved anything. No. We’re on the top. Hey, you add a one and two zeros to that or we walk! Bender, we’re trying our best.
Throw her in the brig. Bender, you risked your life to save me! I meant ‘physically’. Look, perhaps you could let me work for a little food? I could clean the floors or paint a fence, or service you sexually?
So, how ‘bout them Knicks? Enough about your promiscuous mother, Hermes! We have bigger problems. Large bet on myself in round one. You, minion. Lift my arm. AFTER HIM!
In our darkest hour, we can stand erect, with proud upthrust bosoms. I love you, buddy! Ow, my spirit! Is the Space Pope reptilian!?
You, a bobsleder!? That I’d like to see! I never loved you. Oh no! The professor will hit me! But if Zoidberg ‘fixes’ it… then perhaps gifts! Kids don’t turn rotten just from watching TV.
Now what? Leela’s gonna kill me. Yes, except the Dave Matthews Band doesn’t rock. The alien mothership is in orbit here. If we can hit that bullseye, the rest of the dominoes will fall like a house of cards. Checkmate.
It’s okay, Bender. I like cooking too. Wow! A superpowers drug you can just rub onto your skin? You’d think it would be something you’d have to freebase. I decline the title of Iron Cook and accept the lesser title of Zinc Saucier, which I just made up. Uhh… also, comes with double prize money.
Son, as your lawyer, I declare y’all are in a 12-piece bucket o’ trouble. But I done struck you a deal: Five hours of community service cleanin’ up that ol’ mess you caused. No! I want to live! There are still too many things I don’t own!